Do you feel the need to always be involved in your child/children’s lives? Do you find yourself constantly worrying about them? Do you get busy with house chores and work or business? Are you doing this all alone?  A lot of this is genuine love. But let us talk about how to take it one step at a time and delegate, delegate, delegate.

I heard of a woman who passed away. She had three male children and catered for them all by herself. She would do house chores and care for the husband and the home. One unfaithful day, she slumped and died, she was in her early 40’s, cause of death, Hypertension which one of the many factors that brought it on, was stress-related.

This made me reminisce on when my daughter was two years old and I had no help. I was not working at the time but I remember going through a lot of stress. I was doing a lot by myself, trust me, most of them were not completely necessary. It is important not to be a lazy woman by this I mean make sure you can do several things by yourself but still, get people you can trust and train them on how you want things around you managed.

As a new mum, it is advisable to get as much rest and help as needed. Try to delegate chores to families and friends, Grocery shopping, market runs, laundry, and even babysitting are tasks that you should assign out. Try to get enough rest in the first few weeks after birth. Your body just experienced something different, and it requires time to heal.

Your mind too is trying to comprehend everything around you and needs time to adjust; you just had a major life-changing experience and this can cause emotional trauma so relax – rest a lot. We have been there and we know how hurting it can be to your body and mind when you try to be the superhero – you are a superhero already I mean, how many men can carry a baby for 9 months and give birth to it! Lol

So don’t stress yourself so much. Get help, call family and/or friends to help you with things, there is no shame about it, we all need the help every now and then especially after having a baby. Join communities if you need to like our Momat4ty community on WhatsApp, where you can share any thoughts, feelings, or pain as it is a no-judgment group.

Try and understand the importance of delegating chores, it gives you room to breathe and recuperate. You can also delegate chores amongst the older children. I believe children from the age of 4 can start doing some chores, like picking up their toys, taking the plates to the kitchen. As they grow older, you find chores suitable for their age.

Please try not to assume you can do everything by yourself. Just always remember to be self-sufficient.

It is also important to also ask your partner for help. If he is available, let him help with the grocery, he can also do school runs, bathe the kids, help with homework, and a host of other things around the house.

Asking for help is no sign of weakness and you would be surprised that a lot of people are willing to help once you ask for it.