Hello there, it’s been a while and we thought to discuss again about having a baby after 35 but most especially, after 40.
Having a baby after 40 can be a joyous and rewarding experience, especially if you had to wait for so long to be a mom. However, it can also be stressful and emotionally challenging. The physical demands of pregnancy and childbirth can be more difficult for older women, and there is an increased risk of complications such as miscarriage, premature birth, and low birth weight.
Additionally, older moms usually face social stigma and criticism, especially if they are Nigerians like I am. This can bring in the imposter syndrome and worries about your ability to provide for your children’s needs. It can also bring up a misfit as you tend to be attending school functions with other moms who are younger than you and might not want to connect with you.
I remember when my son started school, it was add to fit during PTA and it made me stop attending PTAs but one day I realised I was there for my child not for others and so I started attending again and I found groups of older Moms to share my pains with even though they were far away in the USA but they gave me such support before I started finding more older Moms within Lagos, Nigeria.
Despite these challenges, many women over 40 have successful pregnancies and healthy babies. With careful planning and preparation, it is possible to manage the stress of having a baby later in life and enjoy this special time in your life. You can also find a community of older moms that understand what you are going through and where you are coming from as this clique is fast growing i.e. older moms.
Here are some tips for managing the stress of having a baby after 40:
- Knowledge is key: Educate yourself about the risks and benefits of pregnancy over 40. The more you know, the better prepared you will be to make informed decisions about your care. Go through our blog and follow us as we usually share tips and tricks and most especially, self-help support.
- Speak Up: Talk to your doctor about your concerns. They can provide you with personalized advice and support. I know in Nigeria our doctors don’t bring it up but trust me, they are aware of older motherhood and will help you through when you need them.
- Find your peers: Join a support group for women over 40 who are pregnant or have recently had a baby. Sharing your experiences with other women can help you feel less alone and more empowered. Reach out to us and we can connect you if you need that support.
- Be Conscious of yourself: Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Eat a healthy diet, get regular exercise, and get enough sleep. Find healthy ways to manage stress, such as yoga, meditation, or spending time in nature. If you need the ush, we know of many of such groups that you can plug into.
- Speak to a wellness coach: Seek professional help if you are struggling to cope with the stress of pregnancy. A therapist can help you develop coping mechanisms and manage your emotions. We have a standby soul coach who will give you 15 minutes of free counselling so you don’t have to worry about the first appointment.
It might be hard to take all this up at once but with time, you will find you are doing it easily and building your self confidence as an older Mom. Trust me, we all passed through the tough stages but found our feet in time because we have the life experience to make it work.
Yes, older moms have the life experience and financial stability to make it work so don’t be shy, get two nannies if you want, and build a support system that you can sustain and be healthy, mind and body to enjoy motherhood!
If you know you will be an older mom soon, do follow all our socials and subscribe to our blog so you can get first-hand information about being an older Mom. Generally, being a mom is a beautiful thing so never doubt your choice of being a mom no matter your age!
Xoxo
Suziette