Motherhood, Career’s Graveyard for African Women
Growing up as an African girl, I was told I could be anything I wanted to be. A doctor, an engineer, a lawyer—the possibilities were endless. Our parents encouraged us to dream big, work hard, and chase excellence. But somewhere along the way, that message changed. Suddenly, the focus shifted from our ambitions to our duty to start a family. The same voices that once pushed us towards success started reminding us that a woman’s greatest achievement is marriage and motherhood. And just like that, our lifelong dreams became secondary—or worse, irrelevant.
As African women, we are raised to be the emotional pillars of our families. We are supposed to be strong, nurturing, and selfless. When struggles arise, we are expected to absorb them in silence. We are taught to sacrifice without complaint, to bear the weight of everyone’s emotions while suppressing our own. But this expectation takes a toll, especially when starting a family and pausing or even ending a career that we worked so hard to build.
The transition from career woman to full-time mom is not always a smooth one. It comes with stress, loss of confidence, and a deep sense of self-doubt. We start to question our worth beyond motherhood, wondering if we will ever regain the professional ground we lost. The frustration builds up, and without an outlet, it manifests in anger, irritation, and resentment. But it shouldn’t be this way.
I remember my own story: I was the driving force behind a culture rebranding initiative at my company—coming up with the ideas, crafting the messaging, and shaping the entire campaign. But just as it was about to take off, I went on maternity leave. When I returned, someone else had taken all the credit for my hard work, and I was sidelined as if I had never been part of it. It was devastating—heartbreaking to watch my efforts celebrated while I was erased from the narrative.
We should not have to choose between family and career. We should be able to take a break to raise our children without fear of being left behind professionally. Workplaces need to be more accommodating to mothers, ensuring that re-entry into the workforce is not just possible but encouraged. Companies should provide flexible work arrangements, mentorship programs for returning moms, and remote opportunities that allow women to stay engaged while raising their families.
Additionally, stay-at-home moms should have access to online training programs and remote work options so they can continue developing their skills. Governments must also step up by offering support, such as free WiFi for stay-at-home career moms, so they can keep learning and working while nursing their babies. These changes will ensure that women do not feel disconnected from their careers and can transition back to work with confidence when they are ready.
Supporting working mothers is not just about fairness—it is about progress. A society that values the contributions of women, both at home and in the workplace, is a society that thrives. The journey of motherhood should not come at the expense of our dreams. It’s time for African moms to receive the support they deserve, and it starts with recognising that we cannot—and should not—carry the weight alone.
